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The Week’s Most Bacon Foresworn, Trans Nazi Scorn, and Minister of Porn Headlines

A MODEL CITIZEN
They say attack is the best form of defense; but in today’s Islamized Germany, defense now just gets you attacked. John Rudat is—or was—a 21-year-old male model from Albany, N.Y., who bravely intervened to save two women from being harassed by Syrians on a Dresden tram. For his efforts, Rudat was given a free nose job with a knife by, he says, a known immigrant thug and drug dealer.

The apprehended Syrian suspect was released from police custody within mere hours following arrest, however, as there “was no evidence” he was the one who had carried out the stabbing. After all, it could have been any one of around approximately one million others scattered across Germany these days, all of whom appear to look and act exactly the same.

Such individuals are habitually described as “vulnerable refugees” by the media and authorities, which is all part of our current trend of egregiously mislabeling victims as criminals and criminals as victims; perhaps the real reason the Syrian was released was because he claimed Mr. Rudat had callously attacked his knife with his nose.

LYING DUTCHMEN
Also this week, a 17-year-old Dutch girl named only as “Lisa” cruelly but fatally assaulted the blade of an innocent 22-year-old asylum seeker and alleged semiprofessional rapist with her neck, an offense technically known as a “reverse guillotine.” The killing sparked mass protests from Holland’s feminists, who marched through the streets bearing placards blaming simply “men” for the crime. Which men, though? “Not all men, but always men.” Was Amsterdam’s Anne Frank once killed only by “men” too, then? Don’t be silly, the Nazis were white men, so they can safely be named!

“Perhaps the real reason the Syrian was released was because he claimed Mr. Rudat had callously attacked his knife with his nose.”

Catholic churches across Holland declared a minute’s silence in Lisa’s memory—not only for her, but also for any and all “other victims” who had been “threatened or attacked because of appearance, race, sexuality [or] religion.” In other words, for her murderer, too, then.

As news of the femicide spread, sales of an innovative new anti-rape product, “X-Marker,” have shot through the roof: It emits a special dye onto attackers’ bodies, temporarily turning their skin blue for the next three days straight. Expect the Dutch Catholic Church to announce a special vigil deploring the consequent racist smearing of the Netherlands’ totally innocent, valued, and diverse immigrant Smurf community as being habitual sex offenders themselves any day now.

DEFENSIVE LANGUAGE
Donald Trump is a man who has long known that attack is the best form of defense, particularly when it comes to Iranian nuclear facilities. He’s also a very plain speaker, possibly because he has the vocabulary of a 2-year-old.

So, it should come as no surprise that Donald has now floated the idea of renaming the Department of Defense by its old, and way more accurate, pre-1950s name of the Department of War.

Back in the good old days when it was still called the DoW, Trump observed that this had “a stronger sound,” one so intimidating it automatically meant “we won the World War I” and even its acclaimed and much higher-budget sequel. Yet America has since lost winnable fight after winnable fight in petty little theaters of conflict like Vietnam and Iraq, a phenomenon that could only possibly be attributed to the department’s poorly chosen post-WWII name.

“‘Defense’ is too defensive,” Trump complained, thus implying he should have retitled it the Department of Offense instead, as “We want to be offensive, too, if we have to be.” If he really wanted to be offensive, he should have renamed it the Department of Wog-Bombing.

Or, if he really wanted to be honest, simply the Israeli Foreign Ministry.

PEPPA-SPRAY PIG
Somewhere offensive language is definitely not allowed these days is the nation formerly known as Great Britain, but recently updated for the purposes of accuracy to become Al-Britannia, due to all the Smurfs living there right now. Al-Britannia’s population presently labors under a dictatorial form of unjust, two-tier neo-apartheid racial government, in which the oppressed white natives are policed in one way, and their new privileged non-white Muslim Smurflords are policed in another.

Matters reached a particular nadir this week when a headline appeared in broadsheet newspaper The Daily Telegraph alleging that, in Al-Britannia 2025, “Shoplifters can steal sausages with impunity. But mention bacon to a Muslim and the police come running.”

This referred to the strange case of a 23-year-old man arrested by British cops for the alleged “crime” of standing outside a mosque in the Lake District and singing the words “We love bacon” in a silly voice. These words, said the constable, might “be perceived to be racially abusive” under the terms of Section 5 of the Public Order Act 1986. But the mosque itself is still under construction, so presumably will not actually have contained any Middle Eastern bacon-shunners at all yet. So who was really supposed to even be present to have their ears offended here? As a demonstrable pig, maybe it was the officer himself who felt he was being abused?

Meanwhile, The Daily Telegraph angrily pointed out that while a good, honest white Englishman was instantly handcuffed just for mentioning meat near hypothetical Muhammadans, scummy shoplifters can “get away with pilfering up to £200 worth of pork products with very little risk indeed of finding themselves in a police cell,” due to prosecutors generally not bothering to indict miscreants for the theft of goods worth up to that specific sum from commercial premises.

This, argued the newspaper, was yet further proof of two-tier justice for whites and Muslims in the nation these days. But do Telegraph journalists really think that Muslims were the most probable suspects to have been stealing sausages in the first place? Small slabs of pork are more likely to be stapled to other products as makeshift anti-shoplifting security tags in certain Islam-filled cities of the U.K. like Birmingham—a city whose very name is already increasingly beginning to look like a potential hate crime waiting to happen. If Donald Trump was Britain’s caliph, he would already have renamed the place Birminghalal.

SVEN OR SVENJA?
Also hyper-concerned with the correct use of language is male German neo-Nazi Sven Liebich, a man with absolutely no need to ever shoplift a sauerkraut himself. Clever Sven has supposedly suddenly just morphed into a female German neo-Nazi named Marla-Svenja Liebich, in an attempt to serve an upcoming jail sentence in a women’s prison after being found guilty of “hate crimes.”

A campaigner against 2020’s Covid lockdown, Liebich had said Anne Frank would have been on his side, because “she knew what it meant to be locked up” in her attic (by “men,” we will recall), and had suggested elderly members of a pro-migrant pensioner pressure group called Grannies Against the Right visit refugee centers and offer their collective sexual services up to the incomers “so there will be fewer rapes in Germany.” In other words, it now appears to be illegal to make non-left-wing jokes in Al-Germania as well as in Al-Britannia, too.

Formerly a member of what was thought to have been a fascist cabal called “Blood and Honor,” it turns out Liebich’s club was in fact just a self-support group for self-identified “people who menstruate,” hence the name. Yet Liebich is known to have made what were termed “queerphobic statements” in the past, warning of something called “transfascism,” a phenomenon you may have thought a neo-Nazi would have rather liked.

Threatening to sue anyone who calls him male for 10,000 euros, Liebich nonetheless seems to go out of sein/ihr way to make it clear he is actually male, by walking around dressed in tight leopard skin, a floppy female hat, and big earrings, while at the same time growing a completely contradictory huge droopy mustache (less Hitler, more Kaiser Wilhelm). As such, many have suspected the whole thing may be a cynical dodge intended either to ensure himself a cushy prison posting or to satirize stupidly lenient German gender self-ID laws, which allow a person to legally register as a member of the opposite sex just by filling in a short form.

As well as choosing to self-ID as a woman, Liebich has also now chosen to self-ID as being Jewish, too, threatening to file official legal complaints against anybody he feels to be “defaming my kosher diet.” Stand outside his cell singing “We love bacon” and you’ll get yourself arrested over in Germany, too, these days, then.

Most Germans will only believe Sven is really a woman the day he ends up being sexually assaulted on a tram by some Syrians.

TRANS-NATIONAL RELATIONS
If he wishes to inhabit a truly trans-safe nation, Sven/Svenja should scarper down south toward Colombia, where the nation’s Communist President, Gustavo Petro, has just appointed a “transgender woman,” Charlotte Schneijder Callejas, as a Vice Minister—or as plain-speaker Trump may more accurately put it, a Minister for Vice.

Callejas graduated from the Faculty of Biology at the University of Havana in Cuba, where the curriculum strangely did not appear to actually involve any biology at all; thankfully, “she” later claimed asylum in Bogota before graduating from a far more informative “Feminist and Gender Studies” course at the National University of Colombia, which set “her” straight on the inarguable knowledge that a penis was of course a classic item of female genitalia. And Callejas’ specific new role in Colombia’s Commie government? Vice Minister for Women.

Callejas previously worked in Bogota’s Department for Social Prosperity, where, upon appointment, “she” was acclaimed as being the perfect appointee to the role, which involved responsibility for various transport-related matters, as “she” had extensive prior personal experience of what was termed “active mobility,” which later transpired to mean “cycling, walking, etc.”

Turns out this fool actually meant “menstrual cycling”; upon appointment, Callejas boasted of hoping to enjoy a long period in government. It would be a surprise if “she” could even have one at all.

COLOMBIA PICTURES
Callejas’ new boss at the Ministry of Equality and Equity is Juan Carlos Florián, who is also a gay porn star in France; he once created a left-wing porn actors’ union in Paris. As Juan also has HIV, he will naturally possess intimate familiarity with Colombia’s national hospital system, so should also really be appointed as Minister for Public Health; then Donald Trump could accurately retitle it the Department of Juan Care.

In the possibly badly translated actor bio he uses for his French porn flicks, with titles like BravoFucker and Florian, or the Fantasies of the Uniform, Juan describes himself as being “well-mounted and bogoss,” with “a suburban lascar style” that “turns heads in his neighborhood and far beyond,” with his “little macho side” and “little-strike head” making “all the taci passives drool,” whatever the hell any of that means. Apparently, “Juan has everything you need to kiffer with donf.”

In Juan’s own highly HIV-positive words:

I come from the streets, from the struggle, from real activism. I was a sex worker, I made adult content, I am HIV positive, and I was a migrant. But I am also a political scientist, I have been a builder of public policies, a public manager, a human rights defender, a vice minister and, above all, a son of the people who does not forget where he comes from.

Once you see his films, you won’t be able to forget where he comes from either.

Isn’t it a bit inappropriate for a porn star to be working in government? Not according to the suburban lascar himself, who says his past experiences simply qualify him as having been a man of many parts:

Just as I was a sex worker, I was also a housekeeper, I was looking after the elderly, I was looking at children [hopefully he means looking AFTER children], I was working in food also, because I was in a precarious situation [financially]…. I don’t think that making pornographic scenes is going to affect my ability as a Minister of Diversity.

To be fair, maybe not. If the rumors about the Epstein Tapes are true, many other world statesmen are porn stars themselves too. It’s just that, unlike Juan Carlos Florián, they don’t yet know it.