


Willy’s Chocolate Experience was on display this weekend in Glasgow, Scotland. The event has become somewhat viral for its absurd and quite dingy setting. The event listing promised “a world of enchantment,” with “visually stunning and intricately designed settings,” such as a Chocolate Room and a whimsical Inventing Room.
Instead, there “was maybe 20 chairs, a couple of tables and a half-inflated bouncy castle,” one father, Stuart Sinclair, said. The children got “two jelly beans each, and then they got a half a cup of lemonade.” Tickets sold for about $44 bucks a pop, too. Apparently, police were called to the scene “after attendees who felt conned began demanding refunds.”
There was also an Oompa Loompa “inventing station” that more closely resembled a meth-lab; it was just some chick in a green wig with dark eye circles behind a couple of smoke-filled beakers. One actor said the performance was where “dreams go to die” — scripts and sets were apparently AI-generated “gibberish,” and the performance added a new character to the familiar story: a ghoulish villain called The Unknown, who is “an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls.” He was called The Unknown, according to the script, because “there is a man who lives here. His name is not known. So we call him the Unknown,” Paul Connell, an actor who shamefully admitted he was cast as Willy Wonka, said.
“The worst part of all,” Sinclair added, “there was no chocolate.”
Oh, also, the event was organized by the House of Illuminati. Check out some images here. Just hilarious.