Most pregnant women do not choose adoption. Sometimes it never comes up in a crisis pregnancy. Sometimes it is confused, in the mother’s mind, with foster care. The thought of knowing your child is in the world, but with no ability to communicate, can seem emotionally unbearable. But most adoptions don’t look like that these days. And, as I highlighted in the latest Lifeline newsletter, it’s not unknown for a mother to give birth, choose an adoption plan, and let people in her life believe the child was taken away immediately by Child Protective Services, so worried she was about the stigma of adoption.

Ryan Hanlon from the National Council for Adoption and Elizabeth Kirk from the Catholic University of America’s Columbus School of Law talk with me about a new study they’ve just had published on what goes into a pregnant woman’s adoption decision. It’s helpful for understanding what’s going on — what women are being told, among other things. It is clear in their research and our conversation that we have miles to go toward informed consent when it comes to women making pregnancy decisions, when it comes to unplanned pregnancy in America today:

Just my two cents for a pro-life action item: The lowest of low-hanging fruit is people working at pregnancy-care centers, priests, parish secretaries, and faith-based servants in civil society, who need to know what the adoption options are in their area. Training is a must. Most (good, even saintly) pro-life people working on the frontlines, even, have no clue how to walk a woman through the potential for an adoption plan.

Ditto couples who want to adopt or foster.

And my Pollyannish thought: Could Americans please at least agree on informed consent? Three states have it. That’s shameful. Lives would be saved. And, if you’re “pro-choice,” that makes it a more honest label — the pressure to abort is lessened with actual information about multiple parenting plans, one being adoption.