Paris, January 10

Dear readers,

Just 10 years ago, in January 2014, I was in Maidan Square during the Revolution of Dignity. Two months earlier, Ukrainian president Viktor Yanukovych had refused to sign an association agreement with the European Union and students protesting against this decision had been beaten by the police. After that, thousands of citizens took to the streets and occupied this huge square in the center of Kyiv. It was shortly afterward that I met Elisa [Mignot, the Le Monde journalist], with whom we write these war letters. I was her interpreter during her reports on the spot. Why do I want to tell you this story? Because it's been 10 years. Ten years of battle, 10 years of conflict, 10 years of realizing that the neighboring nation was not at all a "sister" to Ukraine – that's what the two republics were called in Soviet times – but a real enemy.

I don't want to be too negative all the time, but I have to tell you that it's really not an easy time. Attacks have become very frequent again. On the night of January 2, I woke up at 5 am to see that Kyiv was under attack. I found myself sobbing, just like last year during the winter months. Mom was in her corridor trying to protect herself if a missile fell, and so was my sister Sasha. I couldn't get any news about my father or grandmother. But when is this nightmare going to end? I'm no longer looking for a logical explanation, because there is no logic. Sometimes I think very rationally and wonder how much all these attacks cost financially. Wouldn't it have been better to invest in the country's economy?

Last month was also a month of festivities, and this year Ukraine officially celebrated Christmas on December 25. The announcement was made by the Ukrainian Orthodox Church. Before the invasion, the Ukrainian Christmas was based on the Gregorian calendar. It was celebrated on January 7, just like the russians [Olga and Sasha have chosen not to capitalize "Putin," "Russian" and "Russia"]. I'm interested in the Christmas question because it's very symbolic. I asked the Ukrainian students I teach French to online when they celebrated Christmas. The answers were divided. People from eastern Ukraine still celebrated on January 7. The rest, on December 25. People from the east of the country are undoubtedly more attached to the Gregorian calendar. But I believe that, gradually, everyone in Ukraine will celebrate Christmas the European way.

In my family, the "changeover" took place quite naturally, without controversy or discussion. Since last year, my mother and sister have celebrated Christmas on December 25. It's also a way of celebrating it at the same time as I do in France. Besides, our maternal grandmother was born on December 25. Being together on this day also allows us to think about her. As for my father, he didn't celebrate at all. He just told me he wasn't thinking about it at all after all the attacks on the country.

You have 65% of this article left to read. The rest is for subscribers only.