Man, so nice to get outside after a long day at work. Maybe I'll go grab a burger. Can't wait until — wait, what's that noise? It's coming from the sky. It's like a humming…a thumping. Is it an airplane? No, it's not an airplane. It's…NO WAY!

OH, DUDE, IT'S A FREAKIN' HELICOPTER! SWEET!

Look at it! Oh, man, that is so friggin' cool. That pilot's just tearing through the sky! I don't care about anything else right now, to be honest. I can just stare at it all day. Seriously, dude, look at it. A HELICOPTER! Right there!

I wonder where he's going. Dude's such a boss! He's just up there! Flying! I bet he's got such a cool name, too. "Nate." Or "Chance." Something super cool like that. Gotta be.

Dang, he's getting further away now. Just takin' off, man. Look at that helicopter. Dang.

Wait, what was I doing before? Can't remember. Easy to lose track of everything after seeing something that cool.

Friggin' HELICOPTER.

Sweet!

Sick of the woke Oscars? Why not watch the first annual Babylon Bee Awards Show: