THE AMERICA ONE NEWS
Jun 22, 2025  |  
0
 | Remer,MN
Sponsor:  QWIKET 
Sponsor:  QWIKET 
Sponsor:  QWIKET: Elevate your fantasy game! Interactive Sports Knowledge.
Sponsor:  QWIKET: Elevate your fantasy game! Interactive Sports Knowledge and Reasoning Support for Fantasy Sports and Betting Enthusiasts.
back  
topic
Babylon Bee
The Babylon Bee
10 May 2024


NextImg:Trump Assures Jury Stormy Daniels Was Way Hotter Back Then

NEW YORK CITY, NY — Former President Donald Trump made sure members of the jury in the Stormy Daniels hush money trial knew the adult film actress was much much hotter when he first met her.

"She was an eight or a nine back then, let me tell you," Trump explained to members of the jury. "Now she's a bit of a dog; Dogface Daniels, that's what they call her. But not when I met her, I would never touch a dog, not a dog guy. Not that I did touch her…but if I had…she was smokin'. Don't know what happened."

Trump assured members of the jury Daniels was much more attractive ten years ago after the two met at Mar-A-Lago. Daniels took to the stand Thursday in an ongoing hush money case many in the legal field call "totally legit and not at all cooked up by Trump's political enemies".

"She was a babe. Trust me, do I look like a guy who would go after a nasty woman that looks like that," Trump said, pointing to where Daniels was seated. "Not that I ‘went after her', but if I had, she's changed since then. Probably because she got old. I don't go after old women…gross."

As of publishing time, Judge Juan M. Merchan warned Trump that if the former president continued to bark every time Daniels took the stand he would hold him in contempt.

Want proof that Jesus was a woke socialist? Look no further than these classic quotes straight from the Bible.