U.S. — With people still reeling from the shocking news that homes belonging to music artist/producer/entrepreneur Diddy had been raided by the Federal Bureau of Investigation yesterday, the nation collectively wondered if Diddy may have done a few of the things he had repeatedly rapped about doing.

With the star facing federal charges, fans began to suspect that the man who built his career rapping about engaging in seedy criminal activity may have actually been engaging in seedy criminal activity in his daily life.

"It makes you wonder," said longtime Diddy fan Zach Lewis. "All these years, I figured he was just talking a big game in his songs saying really objectionable things about women and other activities he was involved with. Now that I see his home being raided by federal agents, I'm starting to suspect that maybe… just maybe… he might have been doing some things that are illegal. I don't think anyone could have predicted it."

Other Diddy fans refused to believe their favorite hip-hop star could be guilty of any wrongdoing. "It doesn't add up," said Joseph Brock. "You mean to tell me that a guy who wrong such beautiful lyrics that said he wanted to ‘[redacted] and find a woman he could [redacted] and [redacted] all night long' was doing bad stuff to women? I'm skeptical."

At publishing time, Diddy's most steadfast supporters openly speculated that the raids executed on the rap star's homes were most likely an effort to hand down more indictments against former President Donald Trump.

When guns are finally banned in the coming utopia, you may still need to defend yourself on the rare occasion.