LITTLE ROCK, AR — According to sources, a local church's kids ministry spells "kids" with a "z" instead of an "s" at the end, a sure sign that this kids ministry is absolutely lit.

"Kids with a 'z'? Oh yeah, this is gonna be totally off the chain," said one observer.

Covenant Baptist Church is making waves with the new rebrand, having changed the old "Covenant Children's Bible Ministry" to "Xtreme Kidz." The new ministry is expected to be the preferred scene for the hippest, flyest kids of 2025.

"Wazzup, cool kids?" Covenant Baptist Children's Pastor Greg Harper said in a video teaser shown during last week's Sunday Service. "You think kids' church programs are boring and lame? As if! Get ready for Xtreme Kidz — the phattest, illest, most wicked kids ministry ever! We'll have backwards baseball caps, Air Jordans, hip-hop poses from all of the best 90s rap groups, and more! Be careful — Xtreme Kidz might be a little too cool for you… NOT! Check us out next week, homeslices!"

When reached for comment on the reboot, Pastor Harper said he had high hopes. "We've done a lot of research," he said. "We decided that packing our services with as many current pop culture references as possible would help a lot, so we spent a lot of time watching reruns of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, listening to Carman's best albums, and brushing up on our slang terms. It's gonna be rad!"

At publishing time, the Xtreme Kidz had scored a major haul by getting several Sega Saturn game consoles for the kids' church room.

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