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Babylon Bee
The Babylon Bee
10 Sep 2023


NextImg:ESPN Baffled What Athlete Kneeling With Eyes Closed And Hands Folded Could Possibly Be Doing

QUEENS, NY — As tennis champion Coco Gauff knelt on the court with her eyes closed and hands folded, puzzled ESPN commentators were left to wildly speculate as to what Ms. Gauff could possibly be doing.

"What do you make of it, Jean?" asked commentator Pam Shriver. "Perhaps it's a new yoga pose? Never seen anything like it!"

As Ms. Gauff completed the mysterious ritual and rose to her feet, ESPN producers pored over prior videos. "It appears Ms. Gauff has performed this bizarre practice several times in the past," said ESPN's Bill Bonnell. "We're still at a loss. The only similar thing we've ever seen was when people would kneel on one knee in honor of Tim Tebow, also known as 'Tebowing'. Maybe Coco just doesn't know how to 'Tebow' properly."

Eventually, a low-level producer explained to ESPN that Ms. Gauff was praying. That producer was subsequently sacked, and the person who hired him was also sacked for good measure.

In Disney's upcoming reboot of 1937's Snow White, will the Prince kiss the sleeping princess? Or will he obtain her consent first?