U.S. — After watching Kamala self-immolate on national television, Democrats have begun wondering if it's too late to just go back to Joe Biden.

"He was at least able to answer some questions, occasionally," said strategist Neil Massey. "I mean comparatively, Biden was like Winston Churchill compared to this word salad of vindictive psychopathy."

At publishing time, Democrats had decided that Biden was indeed too senile, but checked to see if perhaps Jimmy Carter was interested in a second term.

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