Congratulations to America, if not the world, on making it through round one of the nerdy, geriatric version of Rocky II. On Thursday evening, 81-year-old President Joe Biden finally faced off against former President Donald Trump (a mere 78 years young!) in a long-awaited rematch.
And, thank goodness, Trump won.
First, let’s take a look at Trump’s performance, which, quite frankly, was as good as anyone could hope for. Apart from his meandering, waffling response to CNN’s expected question about accepting the results of the election, his answers showed that Trump had moved away from his argumentative debate style of 2020 and returned to the prime Trump era of 2016.
Regardless of the question or topic, Trump controlled the conversation by keeping the audience’s attention on three crucial areas: the economy, immigration, and foreign policy. He (mostly) refused to get dragged into petty back-and-forths, and he calmly reminded the country of Biden’s monumental and undeniable failings as president. Special attention was given to foreign policy, with Trump repeatedly shoving Biden down the memory lane dedicated to his disastrous withdrawal from Afghanistan.
Even if Trump’s opponent had been equipped with the ability to engage in actual debate, Trump was prepared, composed, and sharp to the point that his victory (given the policy failures of his counterpart) was almost guaranteed.
Unfortunately for Biden, it’s quite obvious that the White House medical team got his dose wrong.
Biden was practically a cartoon version of himself: bumbling, confused, bizarrely vacant. On multiple occasions, Biden slurred his way into oblivion or stared off into the distance as if to say, “Please, mommy, let me go to bed.”
Yes, both men are older than the ideal candidate for what is the toughest job on the planet (except for, perhaps, Hunter Biden’s Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor). But the side-by-side shot of Trump and Biden on screen was simply brutal, providing a stunning contrast that made Biden seem more like a stand-in for a corpse on Law and Order than a candidate for reelection.
On this subject, one calculated move from Trump that worked particularly well was the careful decision to avoid pointing out Biden’s famous mental and physical decrepitude — except for one of Trump’s winning debate lines: “I really don’t know what he said at the end of that sentence. I don’t think he knows what he said either.”
Instead, he stood back, watched, and let Biden shuffle off a cliff.
No matter how many lies Biden tried to piece together between brain freezes — don’t get me wrong, Trump lied too — nothing stuck. Trump debunked many of the more outrageous lies in real time and shrugged off others by immediately putting the spotlight back on his opponent, giving Biden no other alternative but to shut down and pray for the sweet arrival of hot chocolate and bedtime.
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Through it all, this was a debate on policy (apart from the argument over porn stars and golfing prowess). And in the world of policy, only the most devout purple-haired Democrat could watch that debate and declare that Biden is capable of holding down a job, let alone remaining commander in chief of the United States of America.
If the people on Biden’s team weren’t panicking before, they sure are panicking now.
Ian Haworth is a columnist, speaker, and podcast host. You can find him on Substack and follow him on X at @ighaworth.