"I'm from the government and I'm here to help."
Ronald Reagan rightly called that sentence the nine most terrifying words in the English language. And it's true.
But here's FEMA -- the government -- unable to help people in North Carolina.
Residents of a tiny North Carolina town that was almost totally destroyed by Hurricane Helene fending for themselves after FEMA told them that a “road closed” sign is an insurmountable obstacle for the agency to navigate.
“FEMA called me and told me they wanted to inspect my house then called me back to say they couldn’t drive around the ‘road closed’ sign. They weren’t allowed,” local Chelsea Atkins, 38, told The Post.
“You can drive it by car for sure, it’s not that bad, you just have to drive around the ‘road closed sign’. I explained that to them. They said they couldn’t,” she said, recounting her maddening exchange with the embattled federal agency.
Wow.
Just wow.
Fair point.
'Cause it is.
Because that's all they are.
We're on board with this plan.
The FEMA staff did not lose everything, so they don't care.
If a Republican was in the White House, there would be nightly broadcasts from North Carolina.
That would be refreshing honesty.
Government: the embodiment of mediocrity.
No lies detected.
The Babylon Bee couldn't even come up with this.
They sure are.