This is a special piece. It's so special that it originally appeared in Brooding, a subscriber-exclusive newsletter "delivering deep thoughts on modern family life" but was so important that New York Magazine republished it under The Cut imprint. Everyone can see the problem of young white men turning to toxic masculinity. Liberal parents are walking in on their teen sons watching Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson on YouTube. What does a neurotic mother have to do to keep her sons from "sliding right"?

And the military is wondering why young white men aren't signing up.

Kathryn Jezer-Morton writes:

My own feeling is that we progressive parents of white sons could ease up. It’s possible to model and enforce ideological ground rules for your family while also allowing young people to bring up their questions and TikTok-based information without fear of a parental freeze-out. For those of us (like me) very firm in our political beliefs, it feels good to stake your position and defend it well. But as adults, we need to figure out a way to help our young people work through confusion without feeling shunned by their own families. This can mean letting reactionary and unformed pseudo-ideologies breathe the same airspace as us while we invite patient conversation. It might feel dangerous to let a teenager argue that sexism works both ways, but it’s far more consequential to make him feel like that position is forbidden. No one should get canceled at the dinner table.

"It’s hard work, respectfully debating a tragically underinformed teen about things that we deeply care about," she concludes.

She also notes that her husband, who teaches humanities at the local college, says white heterosexual boys "seem very anxious about saying the wrong thing." The "wrong thing," of course, is a conservative position, and the kids probably aren't in the mood for a lecture from their progressive teacher.

She writes that she and her husband "have tried to raise our sons with softness" and have succeeded.