President Joe Biden, 80, took another vacation this week at his beach house in Delaware, site of his infamous bicycle crash. He has since been equipped, we presume, with military-grade stabilizing technology to prevent another embarrassing tumble, which could easily kill him. (Context: Falls are the leading cause of injury-related deaths among Americans aged 65 and up.)

We imagine it was a stressful week for the president, who was recently shamed into finally acknowledging the existence of his 4-year-old granddaughter, the love child of his disgraced son Hunter Biden. Old Sleepy Joe spent the last few days passed out on the beach, ignoring questions from reporters, and walking gingerly down a dark path, assisted by his wife and nurse, Dr. Jill Biden, Ed.D.

Have a great weekend!

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