UFOs over the USA. Are they stealthy Chinese balloons? Nah, I have an answer.

Over the past several days, apparently, we’ve closed sections of airspace over the U.S. only for whatever it was to disappear. I think I know what’s going on. Hide the cattle and everyone living in trailer parks in Oklahoma. Just sayin’.

The Lincoln Project’s favorite gnome, Rick Wilson, is willing to sacrifice himself. Cool – but I don’t think they’d eat him. Too much fat.