Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Military Time
President Trump signed an executive order that essentially bars transgender people from the military. One reason given for it was the recovery period that follows gender-affirming surgery.
“I don’t see why a transition surgery should affect readiness more than any other surgery,” Michael Kosta said on Tuesday. “Trump is acting like they’re doing transition surgeries on the front lines.”
“Do you know how long our wars last? I think they’ll have you back in the game in no time. Vietnam War, 11 years. Afghanistan war, 20 years. Even our “Storage Wars” last 15 seasons.” — MICHAEL KOSTA
“Look, I don’t have a problem with transgender soldiers. As someone who pees himself anytime he hears a loud noise, I think we should be grateful to anyone who’s willing to put their life on the line so I don’t have to.” — MICHAEL KOSTA
The Punchiest Punchlines (Super Bowl Edition)
“I read today it was just announced that Sunday’s AFC championship between the Kansas City Chiefs and the Buffalo Bills was one of the most watched N.F.L. games of all time. Yeah, almost 60 million people tuned in for the game on CBS, plus one guy who accidentally watched it on Paramount+.” — JIMMY FALLON
“That’s right, 60 million people watched the game, and they all had the same thought: ‘How many Matthew McConaughey commercials can there be?’” — JIMMY FALLON
“A Philadelphia man over the weekend climbed to the top of a traffic light pole to celebrate the Eagles advancing to the Super Bowl, despite city officials greasing poles to deter climbing. They didn’t take into account that Philly residents have spent years building up an immunity to grease.” — SETH MEYERS
The Bits Worth Watching
Ringo Starr cleared up a few persistent rumors on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”
What We’re Excited About on Wednesday Night
The British R&B girl group Flo will perform on “The Late Show.”
Also, Check This Out
The Mona Lisa will be moved to a new exhibition space as part of the Louvre’s upcoming renovation.