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Too Little, Too Late?
On Monday, late night hosts responded to the news that “The Late Show” will end next May. Stephen Colbert gratefully acknowledged the outpouring of support he’d received since the announcement last Thursday, while also lamenting the grief and anger fans have been expressing.
“Folks, I’m going to go ahead and say it: Cancel culture has gone too far,” Colbert said, keeping a comical bent.
“I want to thank everybody who reached out to me over the weekend, including one text from an unknown number offering a high-paying I.T. work-from-home job for only two to three hours a day. Yes, I am very interested, and I will be sending you my routing number in May. Daddy needs a job.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
Both Colbert and his friend Jon Stewart offered a similarly expletive-laden response to CBS, while the latter admitted he is “certainly not the most objective to comment on this matter.” Stewart reminisced about his shared history with Colbert on “The Daily Show” back before Comedy Central launched “The Colbert Report” as a successful spinoff.
“We were two pretty good-sized fish in a reasonably small basic cable pond. Both of our shows reached an inflection point in 2015. Stephen chose to challenge himself by seeing if he could succeed the legendary David Letterman in, quite frankly, a much bigger pond than the one he and I had been swimming in, and I quit.” — JON STEWART
“And, if I may, watching Stephen exceed all expectations in the role, and become the No. 1 late night show on network television, has been an undeniable great pleasure for me as a viewer and as his friend.” — JON STEWART
“Now, I acknowledge, losing money, late-night TV is a struggling financial model. We are all basically operating a Blockbuster kiosk inside of a Tower Records. But when your industry is faced with changes, you don’t just call it a day. My God! When CDs stopped selling, they didn’t just go, ‘Oh, well, music, it’s been a good run.’ — JON STEWART
“Well, over the weekend, somebody at CBS followed up their gracious press release with a gracious anonymous leak, saying they pulled the plug on our show because of losses pegged between $40 million and $50 million a year. Forty million’s a big number. I could see us losing $24 million, but where would Paramount have possibly spent the other $16 million … oh, yeah.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, referring to the $16 million Paramount agreed to pay President Trump to settle a lawsuit
“I believe CBS lost the benefit of the doubt two weeks prior, when they sold out their flagship news program to pay an extortion fee to said president. At that time, poor Andy Rooney must have been rolling over in his bed. That’s right, he’s alive. Andy Rooney is alive.” — JON STEWART
“So here’s the point: If you’re trying to figure out why Stephen’s show is ending, I don’t think the answer can be found in some smoking gun email or phone call from Trump to CBS executives, or in CBS’s QuickBooks spreadsheets on the financial health of late night. I think the answer in the fear and pre-compliance that is gripping all of America’s institutions at this very moment — institutions that have chosen not to fight the vengeful and vindictive actions of our pubic hair-doodling commander in chief. This is not the moment to give in. I’m not giving in! I’m not going anywhere — I think.” — JON STEWART
“And now, for the next 10 months, the gloves are off. Yeah! I can finally — I can finally speak unvarnished truth to power and say what I really think about Donald Trump, starting right now: I don’t care for him. Doesn’t seem to have, like, the skill set. Doesn’t have the skill set to be president. You know, just not a good fit. That’s all.” — STEPHEN COLBERT