Virgins is TLC’s next big reality TV hit! The series follows four adults in their 30s and 40s—Deanna Black, Sonali Chandra, Rhasha Newkirk, and Alex Stunz—who are looking to make a sexual connection and finally lose their virginity. While the premise might sound salacious, the show takes great care with its subjects as they allow themselves be vulnerable before the world by sharing their stories and exploring dating, intimacy, and self-discovery. “I felt that a lot of people experienced the same things I did,” explains Newkirk when asked why she was open to letting camera follow her. “It was good to share how I got through it and maybe help other people in the same situation.”

Stunz agreed that it felt like “the right time” to step out of his comfort zone and connect with another person intimately. He also was encouraged by his sisters to pursue the opportunity. “They said, ‘it would be nice for you to share your story with the world,'” explained Stunz. “They were very supportive.” Stunz also wanted to clear up any misconceptions about people who choose to wait to lose their virginity. “There’s no need to rush something that I personally feel is important,” said Stunz. “It’s not something that someone should pressure someone into doing.”

Both Newkirk and Stunz have tried their luck meeting people in bars or on dating apps without much success. Newkirk, who went through a traumatic divorce, estimates that she spoke to “10 to 15” men online at the same time to try to find a potential partner. “When I told them about things I was doing, they kind of like disappeared,” said Newkirk. “It’s hit or miss with online dating.” Stunz would go out with friends to try to talk to women, but it never felt right. “I would see a group of girls, but I wouldn’t know who was single and that would get awkward,” said Stunz simply.

Newkirk and Stunz stopped by the DECIDER studio to talk about the season so far, what their families thinks of their being on TV, and more.

DECIDER: First, I want to commend you both for doing a very difficult thing. I’m sure there are many people out there who are still virgins later in life who you are making feel very seen. Why did you choose to share your stories with the world?

ALEX STUNZ: Just because it was the right time. My sisters were aware of the ad, and they thought of me. They said, “it would be nice for you to share your story with the world.” I said, “You know what, I’ll give it a go and see what happens.”

RHASHA NEWKIRK: Yeah, I wanted to share my story because I felt that a lot of people experienced the same things I did. Being virgin until later in life is much more common than you think. It was good to share how I got through it and maybe help other people in the same situation.

What’s the biggest misconception about still being a virgin outside of your teens and twenties?

RN: That something is wrong with us, and there is not. We are normal like everybody else. We just made different decisions.

AS: There’s no need to rush something that I personally feel is important. It’s something that you’re giving to somebody else. It’s your life. It’s a very important part of someone’s body. If you want to go out and throw it out, that’s fine too, but you don’t need to. It’s not something that someone should pressure someone into doing.

Both of your families are very supportive, but what were their initial reactions when you told them about the show?

RN: Very supportive. My mom and sister were excited to see themselves on the show at first [laughs]. My mom was like, “oh my god, my hair looks like Cameo from the ‘Word Up’ music video.'” She was like, “why is my hair shaped like that?” I said, “Ma, it’s okay.” They were very aware of how they look and stuff, but I told them they looked great.

AS: I watched the first episode with my sisters at the local restaurant where we shot that first day when I tried to talk to those women. They liked it. They were very supportive. They thought it was funny. When I got home, my parents watched it together. They both liked it, but it was still really weird to them. They’re so used to watching TV in general. It was surreal to see not just me, but all their kids, on their screen.

Rhasha, you stand out from the rest of the cast because you know exactly what you want sexually, which is to be dominated. When did you first start discovering that side of yourself?

I just feel like this is me. It’s just my feminine energy. After seeing stuff on social media and 50 Shades Of Grey [laughs], I was just like, wow! It felt like the right match for me.

Alex, respectfully, it was so relatable to watch you strike out with that group of women at the bar. How did you try to meet people in the past?

AS: I’d go out with some friends and look around and see if I could find any potential women to talk with. A lot of times, it just didn’t work. I would get rejected, and after a while, I just stopped trying to approach new people. The other thing that was tough was seeing a group of girls but not knowing who was single. That would get awkward.

Rhasha, I know you love dating apps, but Alex, did you use them at all to meet people?

AS: I did, I did [laughs]. It wasn’t for me, though.

Rhasha, how many guys do you think you were talking to at one time on the apps?

RN: Oh my gosh, I think it was maybe like 10 or 15 guys? I was going back and forth, and then when I told them about things I was doing, they kind of like disappeared. It’s hit or miss with online dating.

Well, you and your date Zach seemed to hit it off on your date before you revealed that you were a virgin. Have we seen the last of him?

RN: You’ll have to tune in to find out [laughs], but we had a great time. That day was very fun.

What initially drew you to him on the apps?

RN: I like beards.

It’s that simple!

RN: Just that simple!

Alex, you were more than game for that unique round of tantra speed dating at the yoga studio. What drew you to Andrea?

AS: Just her personality. She was vibrant; she was electric. She also had a nice smile and nice eyes. Her energy came out right away, which is kind of who I am too. That’s what drew me to her.

Four other women besides Andrea gave you a bead! Did you ever reach out to any of them?

AS: I did not.

That’s okay! You’re a man who knew who he wanted! Rhasha, you shared your story about your short-lived marriage to your first husband. Do you know if he has seen the show and your glow up?

RN: I don’t care if he has seen it. Just ew [laughs]. Like, that is so done. Thinking about him and the whole situation just makes me want to vomit.

Do you have a message for him in case he sees the show?

RN: I wish you well… in hell [laughs].

[Laughs] Honestly, it’s what he deserves.

AS: [To Rhasha] I wasn’t expecting you to say that [laughs].

Listen, there are two other members of this show: Deanne and Sonali. Have you met them? Could you relate to their stories?

AS: Yeah, we met them in LA a few months ago. They’re very nice, good people.

RN: I can relate to Sonali. I think her cultural blockage is something that I can understand because of the way I was raised . Everybody has a unique story.

Lastly, what can you tease about the rest of the season?

AS: It’s exciting, it’s energetic, and it’s hilarious. I think everyone’s going to love it, and there are some surprises.

RN: It’s entertaining too! It’s gonna be great, truly.

Virgins airs Mondays at 9/8c on TLC