Warning: This article contains spoilers for the movie El Conde, which is in theaters now and coming to Netflix on September 15.
Former conservative British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher was known for her ruthless economic policies that bled working-class Brits dry, metaphorically speaking. But in his latest movie, El Conde—streaming on Netflix this Friday—filmmaker Pablo Larraín proposes that Thatcher was also bleeding working-class Brits dry, literally speaking. Like, as an actual, blood-sucking vampire. Larraín is giving a whole new meaning to the nickname “The Iron Lady.” (Because blood has iron in it! Get it? Get it?!)
In recent years, the Chilean filmmaker Pablo Larraín has gone a bit more mainstream with his biopic dramas of famous women, 2016’s Jackie (about Jackie Kennedy) and 2021’s Spencer (about Princess Diana). But El Conde, which premiered at Venice Film Festival to mixed reviews, is anything but mainstream. Written and directed by Larraín, this meandering dark comedy imagines that the real-life Chilean dicator, Augusto Pinochet, did not, in fact, die of heart failure in 2006, at the age of 91. Instead, the ruthless and corrupt leader—who ruled Chile for 17 years, and was later charged with numerous human rights violations—merely faked his own death. Because Larraín’s version of Pinochet (played by famed Chilean actor Jaime Vadell) is a vampire.
Those unfamiliar with Chilean history may not fully appreciate the irony of watching Pinochet blend human hearts and gulp down blood the blood of his people. Perhaps that’s why, in a wacky Act 3 reveal, Larraín throws a bloodied bone to his viewers from English-speaking countries: Vampire Margaret Thatcher. It’s arguably the most bizarre film plot twist of the year.
From the beginning, El Conde is narrated by a posh British woman with a particular sort of cadence that sparks a jolt of familiarity. It’s eventually revealed that this narrator is, in fact, Margaret Thatcher. Like Augusto Pinochet, Margaret Thatcher is an immortal vampire in this world. But it’s more than that: Not only is Margaret Thatcher an immortal vampire, but she’s also Augusto Pinochet’s mother. And also, she’s kind of in love with him? Talk about complicated!
About 90 minutes into the movie, Margaret (played by actor Stella Gonet) steps out of her bubble of narration and shows up in the flesh at Pinochet’s family home. She explains that she was raped as a young woman by a vampire named Strigoi, aka the name of the Romanian mythological figure who is believed to be the original inspiration for vampires. Then Margaret, now a vampire, gave birth to Pinochet and left him at an orphanage. But now, after all these years, she’s back to be his mom in a weird, Oedipal complex type-way.
Together, Margaret and Pinochet kill all the other vampires at the house and blend their hearts into blood smoothies. This, apparently, allows them to become young again, if they so choose. Pinochet opts to once again become a little boy. Margaret remains an older woman to raise young Pinochet as her own, in Chile. As she sends her now-son off to school, Margaret muses that she may find it interesting to be a rich woman in a country that is so poor.
Well, that was unexpected, to say the least. I know it’s a commentary on parasitic politicians—or maybe a tongue-in-cheek satire on the idea that all villainous men simply have mommy issues—but you’re crazy for that one, Larraín!