You can’t get much more straightforward with a title of a series than Virgins; it’s a reality series that follows four people in their 30s and 40s that haven’t had intercourse yet. The three women and one man all have their reasons and hangups, and the show follows them as they hang out with friends and family, go on awkward dates, and try to explore their sexual selves, whether they have partners or not.
Opening Shot: The four participants in the series Virgins are asked how they envision the first time they’ll have sex.
The Gist: Alex, 34, lives in Reading, Pennsylvania, and he has some ideas why he hasn’t had sex yet. First, he still lives with his parents. Second, he completely overthinks things when he goes to talk to women. His older sisters Samantha and Courtney are flabbergasted that Alex hasn’t gotten any yet, and are shocked when he tells them he hasn’t gone on a proper date in over a decade. They’re determined to get him to get out of his comfort zone, including talking to some women at a local watering hole.
Rasha, 42, lives in Jacksonville, Florida. She’s actually a divorced virgin, having married a friend to help his immigration status. But, while she did think that their relationship could blossom into something, he thought otherwise. She’s recently lost a lot of weight, but never felt attractive at her larger size. She gets advice from a sex therapist and she tells the therapist that she is into BDSM and wants to be a “whore” for the right guy.
Sonali, 37, lives in Hollywood, California. She’s barely dated, and due to her strict upbringing, she’s afraid to even pleasure herself. She goes out on a date with an acquaintance who immediately gets spooked when she informs him she’s a virgin. Sonali has a laundry list of requirements for a match, but also feels that she might not be able to even physically have sex; she’s never even used a tampon. She goes to a pelvic floor therapist to see if she’s having physical issues.
Finally, Deanne, 35, lives in Los Angeles. Outwardly, she seems like a typical good-looking Angeleno who goes out with her friends Mercedes and Jamie and likes to have fun. But she’s extremely picky, and is clueless when it comes to anything about sex. When guys come up to her at a bar and hit on her, she immediately dismisses them because she doesn’t feel a spark.
What Shows Will It Remind You Of? Virgins has a similar format to TLC reality shows like the ones in the 90 Day Fiance universe. It also resembles series like Indian Matchmaking and Jewish Matchmaking.
Our Take: The press notes for Virgins say that the show is a “wild, warm and wonderfully awkward ride,” and we do give the producers credit for mostly not passing judgement on the four people who have decided to go on national television and admit that they’re still virgins as they approach middle age. But that doesn’t mean that they don’t lean on the “awkward” part of that equation a lot, especially as we’re first introduced to the quartet.
Of the four, Alex predictably falls victim to the producer’s edits the most. We’re not sure if they want to show Alex as a good guy who just has no game or if he’s a borderline incel. He’s not an incel, of course, but during a scene at a local pub when his sisters encourage him to talk to a trio of young women at the other end of the bar, it seems like the producers concentrate on the uncomfortable silences he can’t get out of instead of really zero in on why he loses steam when talking to women.
Sonali gets hit with the “too many hangups/too long of a requirements list” prize, especially when she shows the producers her vision board that prominently features the word “Demi-sexual,” which means that a person can’t have sex without deep feelings attached to it. We’re not sure if allowing cameras to follow her in to her pelvic exam was courageous or foolish on her part, but it’s pretty obvious that there’s something a whole lot deeper going on, and we’re curious to see if she gets the proper help.
Rasha gets a bit kinder treatment because, well, because she has very understandable trust issues stemming from her green card marriage. Deanne gets a sympathetic look because the producers are so happy they found a conventionally attractive thirtysomething woman who is just extremely picky.
What we hope to see is all four participants go on dates but also learn how to manage their expectations when it comes to sex; they all acknowledge that they’ve so built up the experience of their first times in their minds to this point that reality may never live up to their imaginations. But as they all go on their journeys, what we want to see is all of them opening their minds to the possibilities (we think one is absolutely ready to do that, as we’ll mention below).
Sex and Skin: The show is called Virgins. Of course, this being basic cable, the sex is mostly talk.
Parting Shot: The pelvic floor therapist shows Sonali a medical dilator, which is supposed to help improve the flexibility of the vagina.
Sleeper Star: We’ll give this to Rasha, who seems to be ready to be dominated by someone she finds even remotely attractive. We’re rooting for her the hardest of the four participants.
Most Pilot-y Line: We wish Alex’s sisters would have seen how casually-dressed the women at the bar were and maybe warned their brother that they might just be there to hang out and not get hit on. Instead, they egg him on to try and he strikes out hard.
Our Call: STREAM IT. Whether you were a late bloomer or not, you’ll appreciate that Virgins treats its participants with mostly care and empathy, even if the producers can’t help themselves sometimes by leaning into the super-awkward moments each has.
Joel Keller (@joelkeller) writes about food, entertainment, parenting and tech, but he doesn’t kid himself: he’s a TV junkie. His writing has appeared in the New York Times, Slate, Salon, RollingStone.com, VanityFair.com, Fast Company and elsewhere.