In Play Dirty, now streaming on Prime Video, Mark Wahlberg is Parker, a professional thief out of pulpy paperback novel legend. But the thing is, this version of Parker he’s playing was maybe originally gonna be played by Robert Downey Jr.? Downey is still an executive producer on Play Dirty, directed and co-written by his Kiss Kiss Bang Bang partner-in-crime, Shane Black. But that’s where his involvement ends in this slapdash-feeling adaptation of a series of crime novels by Donald Westlake. Wahlberg stars in Play Dirty alongside Rosa Salazar and LaKeith Stanfield, with appearances by Thomas Jane, Tony Shaloub, and Gretchen Mol.
The Gist: When we meet him, Parker (Wahlberg) is already heading up a big money heist. It’s the cash room of a horse race track they’re knocking over, until somebody on the crew double-crosses the rest of the crew, and Parker instead wakes up with a bullet to the belly and a lot of work to do, if he’s gonna recover the proceeds he just lost. He forms a new crew – with Zen (Salazar), Grofield (Stanfield), and Ed and Brenda Mackey (Keegan-Michael Key, Claire Lovering) – and together they plan a new heist, one with an even bigger payday and just maybe some side juice, if Parker can make it so his enemies in criminal organization The Outfit, especially Lozini (Tony Shaloub), feel the sting.
Did you get all that? Did you catch those proper nouns? It might be interesting for you to learn that Parker, Grofield, Ed Mackey and his wife Brenda, even The Outift and its heavy, Lozini – are all characters from the various books about Parker by author Donald Westlake, who wrote the series under the pseudonym Richard Stark. Basically, every book is about this cold, calculating thief, whose speciality is the planning and execution of heists, and how every job he’s on inevitably goes south during another version of “Do I have do everything myself?” But the thing you learn with Play Dirty is, as a film, it is inevitably going south. So whether these characters and situations rose out of novels it’s based on really doesn’t matter.
In recent action-type outings, Wahlberg has also come to rely on a tweaked version of his usual brand. Let’s call it perturbed reverse charisma. It’s like, if Wahlberg’s character is required to knock the hell out of some goons, fine, but this activity isn’t going to make him more happy about anything. We don’t know why anyone would want to watch him do this, but he’s still doing it, movie after movie, and here it is in Play Dirty, where his Wahlbergian Opposite Rizz has the effect of making us forget Parker even had a reason for his latest elaborate heisting. There was the bad one, the first one. Which lead to the bigger one. Which leads to the actual one? Which leads to an ever-increasing bill in henchmen lives and property damage? For Parker to…like, get even or something? We forgot the stakes because we got lost trying to calculate how many reps it takes for Mark Wahlberg to frown so hard.
What Movies Will It Remind You Of? Back in 2020, Spenser Confidential was another Mark Wahlberg-led insert of a classic character into Wahlberg-led action-comedy generica. Then, in 2024, Wahlberg led The Union. No classic character to strand in that one, but still with the identical action-comedy generica. Will Wahlberg’s work in Play Dirty help it transcend those other DOA action vehicles? Maybe if his Parker was anything more than Wahlberg simply showing up and looking mad.
Performance Worth Watching: Play Dirty is not giving her much, like at all. But Rosa Salazar is still doing the work here as Zen. At least she’s trying, which is more than you can say for the Play Dirty script. Go ahead, try and keep track of all the people Zen is supposed to be double-crossing.
Memorable Dialogue: Here’s a line of Parker dialogue from Play Dirty. “You tried to kill me. Alright, I’m over it. Look at me. Holding grudges is not how I do business.” In the book series this film is based on, that moment might have gone toward a bit of salty pragmatism. Here, paired with Wahlberg’s flat growl, it just sounds pushy and whiny. Seriously, is he threatening someone or sending back his meal in a restaurant?
Sex and Skin: Some, and it’s somehow more random than the total randomness this film was already highlighting with all of its random murders and violence.
Our Take: Lots of guys have played movie versions of Parker. Lee Marvin (Point Blank), Robert Duvall (The Outfit), Jim Brown (The Split), Mel Gibson (Payback), Jason Statham (Parker) – and Play Dirty even lifts bits and pieces of what those films already lifted from the books. But it’s maddening this doesn’t matter more than it should. We just don’t understand why a movie goes through all the trouble of adapting a character from the page when what it arrivea at is so bland, it could have been adapted from a Chili’s menu.
Play Dirty tries for a little of that dark situations banter. The kind that had goons and other colorful underworld types in Shane Black joints like Kiss Kiss and The Nice Guys all gabbing about payouts and plans amid sharp bursts of violence and near-slapstick moments of personal injury. So you get Wahlberg’s Parker going after Nat Wolff’s Outfit loudmouth, hanging him out of a window, the whole thing – until he’s in a hospital with cartoonish injuries, crying to his boss about Parker. This gag might have heft if Wahlberg gave his guy anything more than standard-issue grim face. But he does not, and we’re left to endure another round of murders and car crashes – with maybe a snowmobile added – until the set of bad guys we’re supposed to care about get closer to proving they’re, like, better at being bad guys than the other ones. That this film seems to want us to scream “Sequel!” as we clap for them is really its final insult. With Play Dirty, we’re the ones who get played.
Our Call: Skip It. With black hole-like precision, Mark Wahlberg sucks out what little life existed in Play Dirty, a choppy heist action-comedy thing from Shane Black. Walberg’s supposed to be Parker, a master thief from a famous book series. But that character’s legacy is wasted. The only thing Play Dirty masters is being annoying.
The new Mark Wahlberg movie Play Dirty is currently streaming exclusively for Prime Video subscribers.
Johnny Loftus (@johnnyloftus.bsky.social) is a Chicago-based writer. A veteran of the alternative weekly trenches, his work has also appeared in Entertainment Weekly, Pitchfork, The All Music Guide, and The Village Voice.