With just a handful of episodes of the rebooted Real Housewives of New York City having aired on Bravo, Brynn Whitfield has cemented herself as the flirty, shameless, happy-go-lucky spit-fire of the group — but on this week’s episode, she continues to peel back the curtain on her dark childhood.
On last week’s episode, Sai de Silva decided to throw a Brynnsgiving with the ladies since Whitfield doesn’t have any family to celebrate Thanksgiving with. In an emotional scene at the dinner table, she revealed that her upbringing was riddled with “abuse and neglect.”
“I wasn’t picked up for six days, or my diaper wasn’t changed,” she said through tears.
The newbie reality star explained that her mother had her and her siblings when she was a teenager, while her “older” father was in and out of jail. Whitfield, who only lived with her parents for the first six months of her life before her grandmother adopted her, told the group that they lived in “Section 8 housing” and relied on “welfare [and] food stamps.”
Following a cliffhanging “To Be Continued,” the tears carry on in tonight’s episode as Whitfield admits she almost took her life as a child.
“I was scared I was gonna get taken away. I just remember for three years, I was scared. I was scared out of my mind. It was fucked up,” she says. “I was so upset that I actually, as a first grader, drank a bottle of Dimetapp because I wanted to sleep forever.”
She recalls feeling as though being “cute enough,” “funny enough,” “smart enough” and “clever enough” would have allowed her to stay where she wanted.
The grim admission finds co-stars Erin Lichy and Jenna Lyons wiping tears away from their own eyes.
“It’s heartbreaking,” Lyons says in her confessional. “I saw her little girl remembering not being cared for. She’s such a beautiful, vivacious, funny, warm, smart girl. And to think of that living in her head, it just feels awful. It was really — it upset me a lot.”
While Whitfield’s dad “revoked all rights as a father” when she was a child, they reconnected when she was a senior in high school. At the time, he was dying in the ICU from cirrhosis of the liver and liver cancer. From there, she says they had a “lovely relationship” and she went up to see him every weekend.
“He did [apologize]. And he said there was never a day in his life that he didn’t look in the mirror and look at a monster,” she tells the women. “I forgave him. Because what the fuck do you do? You forgive him.”
Whitfield adds, “Which is why I don’t like Thanksgiving that much. November 12th, he died.”
The scene ends with the New Yorkers cheering their glasses to “built-in family.”
“People ask how I am so happy. I genuinely am and I’m not even on anything anymore,” Whitfield quips in her confessional. “I’m so happy because I’ve felt so much pain. That’s why I’m just fucking happy all the time — because I know both sides. You choose happiness and it’s so much better to just be happy.”
If you or someone you know are experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 988.