There’s no doubt Survivor legend Parvati Shallow left her mark on Deal Or No Deal Island. The hit reality competition series is in its second season, but Shallow’s impact on the game will be felt for many, many iterations to come. During her tenure on the island, Shallow managed to be safe from elimination a whopping nine weeks in a row before facing the Banker at the behest of her closet ally, Australian Survivor’s “Golden God” David Genat, who allowed her to take fate into her own hands. Genat ran “The Family,” a successful alliance, alongside Shallow until the very end. “David and I were such good allies. I felt so lucky to have had a smart and strategic partner whom I trusted, ” said Shallow.
Given her dominant gameplay and brilliant strategy, it feels fitting that only the Banker and a bad deal during a game of Deal Or No Deal could have taken Shallow out. However, Shallow feels differently. “I don’t like losing, especially to what’s essentially a coin toss,” explained Shallow. “I would have rather lost because someone betrayed me or the numbers weren’t on my side.” However, Shallow wouldn’t change a thing about her decision to face the Banker. “I wouldn’t have been okay with leaving without having had that experience because that’s part of the game,” said Shallow, noting that she “ran that game” until then. “I should have won.”
Shallow thinks that some of her fellow islanders could take a chapter out of her upcoming book, Nice Girls Don’t Win, for their next reality TV experience. Part of Shallow’s gift as a competitor is that she never loses sight of the fact that she’s playing a game. “You experience real emotions when you are betrayed or wronged by someone who you trusted during the game,” explained Shallow. “It’s tough to put [those feelings] aside.” As the self-proclaimed “mom” of Deal Or No Deal Island, Shallow took it upon herself as a veteran player to help newbies like Courtney “CK” Kim. “I was constantly reassuring CK,” noted Shallow. “She couldn’t take the feedback, but I really did have her back.”
Shallow spoke to DECIDER over Zoom to talk about her heartbreaking exit, why she chose to help Alexis Lete during the final excursion, and why “fairness” doesn’t exist in a game like Deal Or No Deal Island.
DECIDER: The queen of DONDI’s luck finally ran out. How did it feel to go out in the Banker’s Temple?
PARVATI SHALLOW: It was so sad. I was wearing my game winning outfit [laughs]. I was ready to win that thing. It was devastating. I don’t like losing, especially to what’s essentially a coin toss. I would have rather lost because someone betrayed me or the numbers weren’t on my side.
If you had it to do over again, would you have told David to make CK play or was it better to control your own fate?
It’s so hard to say. I mean, I would have done the same thing only because I love a new experience. The game is called Deal or No Deal Island [laughs]. I wouldn’t have been okay with leaving without having had the experience of playing the Banker because that’s part of the game. Though, I don’t know if CK would have taken me out. She might not have, but she had already played the Banker and won twice.
Your last lines in the temple were “you can take the Black Widow out of the game, but she can’t be crushed.” Do you feel you upheld your reputation over the course of DONDI?
Yeah, I think I really ran that game. I should have won [laughs]. David and I were such good allies. I felt so lucky to have had a smart and strategic partner whom I trusted. He listened to me. I was like, ’hey, this is what I need you to do in this challenge.’ And he would do it [laughs]. When I was going nuts about Dr. Will [Kirby], he would talk me off the ledge. He would say, “soften your heart to Will.” I was like, ’oh, fine.’ We helped each other a lot. I was having a good time with the silliness and the campiness of The Family alliance. I was just really grateful to him.
The bond that you built with David was clearly real. He was just devastated after your bad deal. Were you surprised to see him so affected?
I haven’t watched the show yet, but he told me about it. He told me he was doing the Pablo Escobar thing in Narcos. You know, when Pablo Escobar’s wife dies and he just sits on the swing alone. David stands in the empty swimming pool with his coffee. He was moping around the island like Pablo Escobar, which I found very funny because I’m a big Narcos fan.
When he was having the last dinner with CK and Lete, he said point blank, “the reason they’re sitting there is because Parv lost at Temple, 100% luck for both of them.” Do you agree?
No, there was strategy in their game. CK and I were very close. Besides David, she was my closest ally. When it became between me and Lete, she really had a hard time choosing. People had a real issue with me having won Survivor and won $1 million on a reality TV competition before. Lete didn’t have that working against her.
Did you think it was unfair that people held your Survivor win against you?
In these games, people will use anything they possibly can to advance themselves. I don’t think fairness really matters. These games aren’t fair. None of them are. Like, I came in as a veteran with a lot more experience under my belt. I ran circles around these people because of the many games that I’ve played. They might have thought that I had my chance at winning and now it was their turn. Beat me then, you know?
Why did you choose to help Lete with the bridge? You could have sabotaged her game, but you didn’t.
I helped with the bridge because I liked her answer. I didn’t really have a relationship with Lete in the game, but then when she gave me that answer, I was like: ’Okay, you got some strategy. Yeah, girl, I’ll help you out.’ I could have gone faster [laughs], but I’m not a bitter person. If somebody beats me and they’re farther down the line than me, that’s okay. I myself have been a victim of a bitter jury. I felt that I should have won a season of Survivor that I didn’t win because the jury was salty to me. I never want to punish someone because I feel a certain way. If you beat me fair and square, I’ll support you. Obviously, I wanted David to win that challenge, so I did the best I could to help by mildly slowing them down.
Speaking of salty, I want to ask about Phillip Soloman. Were you two able to patch things up out on the water? Where do you stand today?
We’re fine. Phillip and I started off close. I love Phillip. He’s funny. He’s sensitive. He’s so quick and sharp. I really enjoyed him as a person. We had so many great conversations, so I was really upset when he was upset with me and thought that I was using his childhood trauma against him.That was never my intention. I thought we were on the same page. It was a shock to me when that conversation happened.
I would have loved to repair things with him during the game, but we weren’t able to do that because he didn’t trust me. Once both of us were eliminated, we were fine. We both rode in the car home together from the Banker’s Temple. Since he was eliminated first, they made him wait in the car for whoever was eliminated next. We just listened to Beyoncé on the way back to the hotel together. We’re very cool now.
One thing I really respect about you as a player is that you never lost sight of the fact that it’s just a game. Do you think some of your fellow competitors could have benefited from that attitude?
Yes, but I think that is also a big ask for new players who’ve never done this. You experience real emotions when you are betrayed or you arewronged by someone whom you trusted during a game. Those are hard feelings, especially the first time theyit happen. They are tough to put aside. I felt betrayed by someone I trusted for the first time during Survivor: Cook Islands, which I wrote about in my upcoming book, Nice Girls Don’t Win. It feels so real. Afterwards, all you want to do is get revenge, and you completely can lose sight of the bigger picture. The second time I played Survivor, I understood that betrayal is all part of the game.
That’s the gift of having veteran players and new players together, but only if the newbies listen and trust what the veterans are saying [laughs]. I was constantly reassuring CK, constantly telling her she was doing a great job. She was always doubting herself, and I was like “girl, you’re good. You’re strategizing with everyone. You can slow down a little bit. You don’t have to be full on all the time.” She couldn’t take the feedback, but I really did have her back.
At some point, I just had to let go [laughs]. It’s like with my daughter. She’s six years old. I felt like all those people on the island were my kids. That’s why I kept calling myself “mom.” My daughter’s got her own opinions and ideas. I’m like, ’brush your teeth, go to bed.’ And she is like, ’no, I don’t want to.’ I’m wrestling her to put her pajamas on and then I’m like: ’go to sleep naked, I don’t care, just as long as you go to sleep and your teeth are clean.’ That’s sort of how I was relating to them [laughs].