“OK, sir. Here’s the damage: $10,000 to dig the moat, $8,000 to fortify the wall, and I don’t know how many alligators you want, but I got a guy who knows a guy who wants $2,500 each.”

Now that’s one Big Beautiful Bill. With crime on the rise in NYC, Alligator Alcatraz sounded like a good idea. Alas, we will have to settle for a soaked lawn and two iguanas.

Alligator Alka Seltzer if you are watching the Yankees and Mets lately.

No action for the Mets on Tuesday. They were rained out. But they did have to cut another check for $1,193,248.20 payable to Bobby “make it rain” Bonilla.

The Mets and Brewers will play two.

Clay Holmes is scheduled to start the early game.

Be it early or late, we will stick with our bet.

$50 on Holmes and the Mets.

Rain, I don’t mind. Still undefeated in July!

Down -339 rainnwilsons.

The one and only Stitches has been handicapping baseball, daily, for the Post since 2019. Miraculously, he has finished in the black twice. But wait there’s more. He showed his versatility by winning the Post’s NFL Best Bet crown last year.