A woman has taken to social media to share the ‘selfish’ choices she’s making as a soon-to-be mom-of-two.
The word selfish here is key and even used by the mom herself, Rachel Renea.
The popular parenting influencer says that while she might come across as “ungrateful” and “bratty”, she insists that her ‘rules’ are the healthiest choices for her and her bub.
“These are just some boundaries I want to implement because of how I felt after my first,” she begins the now-viral Reel that has over 34K likes.
She also provided a caveat to viewers, saying, “This may offend you.”
Given the fact the comments on the post have now been turned off, we can assume that many were indeed, very offended.
First up on the list, Rachel says, “I do not and will not share my baby if I don’t want to. I owe others nothing and neither does my child.”
The next rule applies to her eldest daughter — “I don’t want to hand off my first child for a break. This is our life. Our journey. We do it together as a family.”
In terms of family visits, she defends one-on-one bonding time with her newborn. “I won’t feel guilty if family visits and they don’t get to hold her or feed her. This is our time. Not theirs,” she states.
Finally, she says, “I won’t hesitate to take my baby back when she cries. Even if you think you can soothe her or have done this before.”
She reiterates, “Most importantly, I don’t want a break from either of my children.
“I want help with the house, the chores, the dinners or anything that takes me away from time with my babies.”
In the caption, she explained her choices further, saying, “As a new mom remember this: boundaries aren’t a punishment to others. They should be respected no matter what relation they are to you. Speak up. It’s your life. Your baby.
“This is the most important time for you and baby — don’t feel obligated to have to share it with others. Don’t let them guilt you into doing anything you’re uncomfortable with allowing.
“You’re the mom – you know what is best. Follow that intuition and take what others say and suggest with a grain of salt. YOU GOT THIS.”
While the comments are no longer visible, we can only imagine the amount of backlash she received, as she later edited her caption to add the following statement:
“You don’t know what situations other mothers have gone through to change their minds on their choices. I don’t feel like anyone has RIGHTS to my children because of their relation to my child except their parents.
“But I do feel support from family and friends is a great thing. I obviously love my support system and my children and want them to be involved. I just don’t need to be made to feel guilty or obligated to do things with my children for the convenience of others or that I am not comfortable with. No one is entitled to time with my children and if they feel they are – they usually are the ones to not respect my wishes.”