You know you’re in for a wild ride when Andy Cohen starts a story with, “I was watching a pornographic film the other day.”

On this morning’s episode of his Sirius XM radio show Andy Cohen Live, Cohen recalled watching a porno that made him so uncomfortable he had to turn it off.

The executive producer in Cohen explained that he stumbled across the doctor/patient category, telling his co-host John Hill, “I love a setup. I need a setup … I need a scenario. Give me a construct. Give me a reason for the season. Tell me how it happened. Give me a backstory.”

The Bravo icon then went into full detail about the backstory — which found a college-aged gentleman going to the doctor to find out why he gets made fun of in the locker room.

“The doctor says, ‘I’m going to need to examine you.’ And then the patient says — and this is what absolutely killed it for me — the patient says, ‘But you’re my stepdad,'” a cringing Cohen remembered. “And I’m like, ‘What? You’re putting a hat on a hat here. We don’t need this added layer.’”

He continued, “And now I’m like, ‘Well, this is complicating everything.’ I’m like, ‘What meth head came up with this scene?’ And I’m sure it was a meth head who came up with this.”

According to Cohen, the storyline had “too many layers” for both him and the performers.

“Anyway, it was a fail. I turned it off,” he said, though made sure to point out that the patient in the NSFW scene was getting made fun of because his — as The Real Housewives of New Jersey stars would say — peeshadeel was “just so big that they all have to make fun of it.”

“It just cracked me up,” Cohen added. “I was like ‘Listen, crackheads. Keep it simple, stupid.’”

Andy Cohen Live airs every weekday at 10/9c on Sirius XM’s Radio Andy station.