This season of And Just Like That… has some delicious guest stars, including Rosie O’Donnell, who already popped up on episode one, and Patti Lupone, who seems like such an obvious addition to the AJLT universe that it’s hard to believe she hasn’t shown up here before. But episode two features some guest stars who are perfectly cast and steal the show this week, including Kristen Schaal as the incredibly-named Lois Fingerhood, the Ivy Whisperer who can get (almost) any high school student into college, and Cheri Oteri as a matchmaker hired for Seema.
Anyway, in this week’s episode, Lisa and Charlotte behave like two mothers who watched Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal and found it instructional. When they first learn that the rest of the moms at their kids’ private school have been hiring presitgious college coach Lois Fingerhood, a.k.a. The Finger, to advise their kids on how to get into Ivy League schools, they scoff. Char and Lisa are rule followers, and their school has rules against using outside coaching, encouraging parents to use their in-house college counselor, Debbie. But, after a fairly hilarious interaction with the headmaster, played by Tim Bagley, he tells them, “How do you think we got nine kids into Princeton this year? It wasn’t because of… Debbie.” And so, Charlotte and Lisa go temporarily insane, stalking Lois on Instagram to conveniently run into her at a baseball game where they hire her to talk to their kids about what they need to do to get into an Ivy. (Visually, there is no one more perfect to play this tennis visor-wearing college coach than Schaal, kudos to casting.)
Lois leaves Lily and Herbert Jr. with panic attacks after telling Lily not to tell colleges she’s Asian or adopted, and for Herbert to be more relatably African-American. This causes Charlotte to also have a panic attack, through which she screams, “Fuck Lois Fucking Fingerfuck!” just as Lois is walking past. As Lois leaves, she mutters, “Good luck with Debbie.”
Over at Carrie’s idyllic new mansion, she’s been working on her novel, a historical fiction tale starring a character simply known as “the woman” (does this non-specific descriptor drive everyone crazy? Just me?) who lived in Manhattan around the time when Carrie’s own house was built, in the 1840s (I know this because it’s what she tells Lisette, the Gen Z jewelry designer who moved into her apartment, with whom she has drinks. Lisette is maybe here to infuse the show with a younger voice or something? I still can’t figure out her deal. She gifts Carrie a handmade necklace with the number 245 on it as a nod to Carrie’s old address, presumably so Carrie can remember a life before rats.)
Carrie’s novel so far has no real plot to speak of, just descriptions of what “the woman” is wearing (shoes with buttons), and that she, like Carrie, is entering a new stage of her life in a big ole house. But as Carrie toils in her garden, she’s distracted by the fact that she shares her yard with rats, hundreds of them. And they must be exterminated. So Carrie hires guys to remove her entire bucolic backyard garden so she can re-do the whole thing to be rat-free.
Rats aren’t the only surprise in Carrie’s house though – Aidan shows up unexpectedly for a single night to surprise Carrie (providing this season with its first CARRIE SHRIEK, caused by the sheer terror of seeing an unexpected country giant lumbering into a door frame unannounced).
Aidan’s arrival is delightful but confusing for Carrie who has been trying to give him space so he can be with his kids. Carrie’s been laboring over lengthy voice-to-text memos about things like the rat invasion, only to delete them because she doesn’t want to invade his space. When she tells him this, he calls it crazy, to which she responds, “Is it?” because the man did ask for radio silence, and yet all he’s been doing is calling her to have phone sex and showing up in her house unannounced. He explains that maybe his whole thing about no-contact was “a little overboard” and assures Carrie that she can call and text him any time.
Which leads us to the big dumb table conversation. I kinda feel like every couple has had a table conversation. Compromise in any relationship is finding a big, dumb dining table you can actually agree on, because guess what? People have opinions about tables that lie dormant until the right moment, and then, boom, it can cause a whole relationship to implode. Carrie, still deep into redecorating the house, has found a wood and glass dining table on some website where, apparently, this table is one of a kind or something, and she is desperate to buy it before someone else does. She sends a photo of the table to Aidan and he responds to it with a simple thumbs down emoji which throws Carrie into a spiral. First of all, this man is a furniture maker. Why isn’t he just making them a table? Also, why is Carrie being so diplomatic, he doesn’t even live with her, can’t she just get the table? The table, much like the rats, are a metaphor for this relationship and my head hurts from being hit over the head so hard with them.
Miranda, having just discovered trashy TV, gets addicted to a fictional reality show called Bi Bingo which seems like it would be a variation of Too Hot To Handle if that show was on Logo and Logo still made original content. While she’s out at a Mexican restaurant with the girls discussing her new passion (“I’ve finally discovered the joy of hate-watching!” might be a meta commentary about this show that I truly love but am also always mad at) the tableside guacamole valet, Ava, pipes up to admit she also watches the show and she and Miranda have a moment gossiping about the contestants.
This leads Miranda to return to the restaurant to make conversation with Ava (“You’re using me as a guacamole beard,” Carrie tells Miranda when she realizes that Miranda only brought her to lunch so she could flirt.) When Miranda does ask Ava out, Ava is taken aback, telling her, “Oh my God, I’m flattered but I’m straight. And married.” And now, a mortified Miranda can never go back for tableside guac ever again.
As previously mentioned, Cheri Oteri appears this week as Sydney Cherkov, a matchmaker hired by Seema’s business partner to find Seema a man.
Seems is initially intrigued by the way Sydney is able to read her (in much the same way that Seema is able to read all of her failed dates). Sidney is intuitive and clever which intrigues Seema, but she also encourages Seema to be… not her authentic self. (All of Seema’a animal print clothes “read ‘predator'” and when Seema asks if she should just change her wardrobe to pastels, Sydney, with that perfect Cheri Oteri delivery, asks, “Would it kill ya?”)
Unfortunately, Seema overcorrects and the new, demure version of herself. On a date with a man named Jake that Sydney has set her up with, Seema sits quietly listening to him ramble on, before explaining to him that she’s not really giving him the real version of her.
“I’m not usually this quiet and agreeable. I don’t actually share your views on campaign finance reform.” (Because this is a topic that always comes up on my dates.) She further adds, “I hated the cabernet you chose. And tiramisu is tired.” After unloading all her real feelings, her date excuses himself, never to return. Sidney shows up to tell Seema he’s gone, and Seema fires Sidney, telling her, “This wasn’t the Sydney Cherkov experience, it was the Sydney Jerkoff experience!” Sydney calls back to Seema,”I’ve heard that one before. And guess what? She’s still single!”
And so each of these women is forced to reckon with a fresh start this week. Miranda, having been brushed off by her straight crush, decides she’s going to make a move on Joy, her British colleague. Charlotte and Lisa are, I guess, going to go back to Debbie the college counselor. And Carrie? She’s going to hire a man named Adam to rebuild her garden (i.e. her relationship) and open her up to the possibilities available to her.
Adam (Logan Marshall-Green) is a dangerous combination of zen and hot… the question is, is his manscapey hotness here to threaten Aidan and Carrie’s happiness or simply to be her garden guru?
Charlotte’s shocked and relieved reaction after seeing Lily making out with her hot ballet boyfriend Diego that she has been crushing on: “Honey, I am so sorry, and also I’m happy because we all thought it was just in your mind!”
“I assumed you were queer because of Bi Bingo,” Miranda tells Ava the waitress. “It’s a TV show,” Ava replies. “I watch The Walking Dead and… I’m not a zombie.”
Anthony, finally opening a brick and mortar (“make that dick and mortar”) Hot Fellas Bakery, invites Charlotte to see the store under construction, telling her, “Don’t tell gay porn but hot construction workers aren’t a thing.”
Also Anthony: “Speaking of thrilling: bread sconce!”
Liz Kocan is a pop culture writer living in Massachusetts. Her biggest claim to fame is the time she won on the game show Chain Reaction.