I don’t trust people who don’t have at least one or a few disreputable opinions or suspicions. That doesn’t mean I want everyone to share their crank theories with me. But, my feeling is how can you trust someone who believes all the “correct” things?

That is, a person who believes nothing weird or controversial either doesn’t think at all, or they assiduously avoid ever contradicting established authority, or they have an overweening fear of appearing “low-status.”

I’m sure NR readers might single out some of my dearest beliefs as qualifying as crank opinions.

They don’t even have to be fully formed. In recent weeks, I noticed I just couldn’t stand to wear certain polo shirts anymore. Then I looked and saw they all had synthetic fibers in them, mostly polyester.

I did no heavy research, but just some cranky reflection. Why are they constantly trying to replace the petroleum products that go into my car but simultaneously promoting their use as human clothing? (Who is “they”? I’m not entirely sure.) But when I went looking for a New York Mets polo to buy for a future outing with my family, I saw that every single one of them had synthetic fibers in them, and some were openly advertised as being made of recycled bottles. I feel like there must be someone sinister, and very rich, clad in worsted wool and merino and the finest cotton, laughing at us clothing ourselves in the same gear that Gatorade is dressed up in. I also have crank theories on our entry into World War II. But that’s for another day. What are yours? Or at least the ones you are willing to share?