Gaza is bad. Really bad. Like, really bad man. Everyone starved to death two years ago. Somehow they’re still alive and firing rockets and drones. But we need to get them food right away because they can’t just eat rockets and drones all the time. They also need Krispy Kreme and Halal McDs.

Because it’s hell over there. Utter, total hell.

Gaza has become hell. – Doctors Without Borders – Apr 24

“Born into hell” UNICEF

“Northern Gaza is what you imagine hell to be” Al Jazeera – Oct 2024

Bad news though. Gaza’s hellscape has jumped the shark and is now officially worse than hell.

Gaza now worse than hell on earth, humanitarian chief tells BBC – BBC

Worse than hell on earth? Hell on Jupiter? Hell on Mars? Hell at Disneyland?

Where does the Beeb go after this? Gaza is worse than 1 million hells. Gaza is worse than Doom the Movie. Gaza is worse than hell if it froze over and was populated entirely by clones of Joe Rogan. Gaza is so bad that it turned into a black hole and all the aid trucks are being swallowed by the event horizon.

Gaza is worse than everything meaning that it’s thus more important than everything.

This reminds me of the scam where people pretending to be ‘atomic scientists’ keep moving the hand of the doomsday clock one nanosecond closer to midnight. But at some point, maybe in Trump’s third term, they’re going to have to bite the bullet and declare that we’re now living in a worse than doomsday world.

Gaza is now officially worse than hell on earth after years of telling us that aside from its mansions, beachfront resorts and malls, Gaza is hell. So now that they pulled the lever and declared that Gaza is worse than hell, what’s next? That heated rhetoric has to go somewhere because Hamas won’t save itself.

Feel free to volunteer things that Gaza is currently worse than. Like L.A.