Wedding dress insult: Woman asks Reddit users to weigh in after she bluntly critiqued her friend's gown
Reddit users were divided about whether a woman was right to share an honest opinion of her friend's unusual wedding dress.
In a June 3 post on Reddit's "Am I the A--hole" (AITA) subreddit — titled "AITA for telling my friend that I didn't like her wedding dress?" — redditor zzz_Macaroon_7983 asked people to weigh in about how she gave her honest opinion.
The user explained that three months ago, she attended her friend's wedding, "a destination wedding at a beach venue."
"When she arrived, she was wearing a poofy bright red dress, the kind you'll see celebrities wearing at the Met Gala," wrote the woman.
While the dress was "very unique and she stood out beautifully," zzz_Macaroon_7983 also did not think the dress flattered the bride or the venue.
"I personally didn't like it, but I wasn't going to be the person to tell her that on her wedding day and ruin the night for her," she said.
The Reddit writer explained that she kept her opinion to herself and did not share her thoughts on the dress with anyone else.
"It isn't my place to tell her what she shouldn't have worn," she said.
Yet that changed on Friday, when the bride herself pressed zzz_Macaroon_7983 for her opinion.
"Yesterday, [the bride] came to my house to watch a movie with me," she wrote.
"She asked me, 'I didn't ask you if I looked confident or unique, I asked you what you thought about the dress.'"
"Before we started watching, she talked about how her parents told her that her wedding dress didn't look good and that she should've worn a white simple dress (they are a very traditional type)," wrote zzz_Macaroon_7983.
It was later explained that the bride wore red as it is customary in the groom's culture that brides wear red clothing.
The bride then asked the friend what she "honestly thought about her wedding dress."
The woman on Reddit shared with others that she initially tried to dodge the question — telling her friend that "she stood out and looked confident."
"But then she asked me, 'I didn't ask you if I looked confident or unique, I asked you what you thought about the dress,'" she wrote.
"I didn't want to lie to her," said the woman on Reddit, "since we've always had a very blunt relationship. She's always told me the blunt truth, but keeping in mind that it was obviously a really big day for her, I tried to be kind and sensitive about my honest opinion," she added.
So, she was honest — perhaps too much so.
"I told her that while I thought that the dress made her stand out amazingly and it was very unique, in my personal opinion, I wasn't very fond of it and that it did not flatter her," she said.
This did not go over well.
The friend "was quiet for a second and then she got up and left."
Added the woman on Reddit, "I tried messaging her, but I got no response."
"I'm having trouble even contemplating whether I was wrong, so what do you think?"
The woman's husband as well as a best friend then reached out to zzz_Macaroon_7983, telling her that she was out of line for what she said.
"One of her best friends sent me a long message about how while he agrees with me, I didn't have to tell her that because it isn't our place and that I came across as jealous and pathetic," she said.
"I don't know what to do or say, and I'm having trouble even contemplating whether I was wrong, so what do you think — AITA?" she asked on the social media platform.
On the AITA subreddit, people can reply to posts and indicate the poster is "NTA" ("Not the A--hole"), "YTA" ("You're the A--hole"), "NAH" ("No A--holes Here") or "ESH" ("Everyone Sucks Here").
Users can "upvote" responses they think are helpful and "downvote" ones that are not.
Fox News Digital reached out to zzz_Macaroon_7983 for comment or any updates.
The top responses on the site contained a mix of opinions, especially after zzz_Macaroon_7983 added that she initially tried to skirt the question when her asked her what she thought.
"She’s not going to wear it again, so it’s not as if you did her a service to stop her embarrassing herself in the future. You have [spoiled] the memory of how amazing she felt, though. Well done," said Reddit user WinOk2110, who added "YTA."
Other disagreed, saying that the bride should not have asked if she did not want to hear the answer.
"I'm sick of the fact that women are infantilized all the time (I am a woman)," wrote a Redditor by the username "Betzschaba."
"If someone asks for an honest opinion, they have to be prepared to receive an honest opinion and not have a tantrum about it," this person wrote.
A handful of users rated the story as "NAH."
"Before the wedding, your honesty would have been constructive criticism, but after the fact, it just becomes an insult," said a person with the username "throwtruerateme."
"If she felt amazing and confident in it, then that was the perfect dress for her."
"I don't think you meant to harm your friend but a lesson here: Brutal honesty doesn't have to mean sharing your very worst thoughts," this person also said.
"You could have just as easily and truthfully said, ‘You created a stunning moment and were positively glowing in that dress!’ NAH," the user added.
While some posts in the subreddit are tagged with "Not the A--hole" or "A--hole" by Reddit when a clear decision has been determined by users — this one was not.
Still, zzz_Macaroon_7983 concluded that she was the one in the wrong.
In an update to the post, she wrote that she "didn't really think it through many times in my head and just said what I was truthfully feeling."
She added, "And I understand how wrong it was, especially since it was about something she now couldn't change."
The friendship might have been saved, too: The woman on Reddit wrote that she would be meeting up with her friend and would apologize for what she said.
"If she felt amazing and confident in it, then that was the perfect dress for her," she said.