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Boston Herald
Boston Herald
18 Feb 2023
Mike Pingree

NextImg:Looking Glass: Look, officer, just leave me alone and let me graze here

A convicted murderer tried to escape from the maximum security Chonchocoro prison in Bolivia by dressing as a sheep. The man, who is serving 15 years, donned a fleece coat to sneak past guards and even made it to a field — where he was caught crawling around on all fours.

THIS CALLS FOR A BREWSKI!: Police approached a Mercedes-Benz parked in the middle of a road in Cape Coral, Fla. and found a man sitting alone in the passenger’s seat with dozens of beer cans scattered at his feet. They said that he was “unable to speak” due to his level of intoxication, and, while they were talking to him, he cracked open a beer and started to swill it down.

HEY, BOB, LOOKS LIKE WE’VE GOT ANOTHER CUSTOMER: A man crashed his pickup truck into an auto repair shop in Wauwatosa, Wisc.

OK, SO MAYBE I WENT A LITTLE TO FAR: A teacher at a junior high school in Hazel Park, Mich., planted a note in his classroom saying the school would be blown up the next day so could get the day off.

I’M PRETTY SURE HE WENT THIS WAY, SARGE: A burglar broke into a home in Madison, Wisc., at 5 a.m., but fled when the resident woke up. Officers followed his tracks in the snow leading from the home and found the man walking barefoot in nearby yards rather than on the sidewalk or in the street.

SO DON’T BLAME ME: A man ran up to dozens of men in Los Angeles and cut off their “man buns.” He said that the Lord told him to do it.

CHUG! CHUG! LURCH!: A man who stole a woman’s SUV from her home in Clearfield, Pa., turned around and drove back towards her residence because he didn’t know how to drive a vehicle with a stick shift, and was grinding gears, causing the car to stall out. He admitting to smoking meth and weed.

EN-GARDE!: A 21-year-old man ran naked through several floors of a hotel in Des Moines, Iowa, wielding a toilet plunger and threatening and chasing a man he encountered in the 18th-floor stairwell. He set off fire alarms and swung the plunger until he was subdued by police officers.

WHAT WAS THAT!?: A man crawled under a woman’s SUV in a parking lot in Palmdale, Calif., while she was asleep inside the vehicle, and started sawing the catalytic converter off in an attempt to steal it. But the noise woke her up and she put the car in reverse and ran him over. She stopped when she felt a bump.

PRETTY COOL, EH, OFFICER?: An 18-year-old man, who was pulled over in Fort Wayne, Ind., for driving a Mustang nearly three times faster than the speed limit — 130 mph in a 45-mph zone — seemed “proud” when confronted by the arresting officer and asked to see the radar.

THIS SHOULD BE PRETTY EASY, RIGHT?: When burglars broke into a convenience store in Victoria, British Columbia, they soon ran afoul of recently-installed anti-intruder technology which caused a thick cascade of smoke to overwhelm them. An alarm blared and strobe lights went off which prevented them from seeing or hearing each other, so they ran away.

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