Oh, it looks idyllic...positively peaceful and delicious! But lurking just a few seconds away is the inexorable upward push of those bubbles on the straw, and the horrid, wet, messy thump of the straw hitting the table.

Straw designs have not kept up with carbonation technology, and that is simply unacceptable in today's technologically advanced world.

Maybe the straw should be weighted. Maybe there should be a velcro attachment. Maybe there should be a tether on the lip of the glass.

I don't know, because I am not a straw engineer!

THIS SHALL NOT STAND!