Yup...that's Dildo's patented black thumb at work! I can't grow anything...including garlic. I even got it to sprout, but once I transferred it into actual dirt, it was only a matter of time before it gave up its garlicky ghost, and I will now have to buy garlic like all the other losers on the block.

This coming fall I will carefully follow the instructions from the best garlic growers around. I figure I'll get at least halfway to a crop before it rots or explodes or is snatched up by space aliens.

That's progress!