Right before writing this column this morning, I watched the magnificent 1935 MGM version of Mutiny on the Bounty starring Clark Gable and Charles Laughton on TCM. Like most early 20th-century art revering the British Empire, including by the rebellious colony that overcame it, the film only made me sad where it once inspired me, particularly the ending. The final scene shows pardoned real-life ex-Bounty Midshipman Roger Byam (Franchot Tone) being welcomed aboard ship by a new anti-Bligh captain.
“We’re off to the Mediterranean, lads!” he exclaims. “We’ll sweep the seas for England!”, as the soundtrack rises with the music and lyrics to Rule, Britannia! Yet today, all around the world, every former British colony save America has become a bad joke, and none lamer than our neighbor to the north.
The no longer Great and no longer White North last week appointed a new president of the Public Health Agency of Canada. One of the direst threats to public health is childhood obesity. So, naturally, Ottawa chose Nancy Hamzawi (cq), an overweight, physically unfit Muslim woman, to lead the fight against it.
You’d think Hamzawi’s work experience could overcompensate for her obvious detraction, and according to the Canadian government, it does. Before entering the health field, Hamzawi was a force against the “existential threat” of Climate Change. Just reading her official bio requires a degree in Word Salad Tossing.
Ms. Hamzawi served as ADM of Environment and Climate Change Canada’s Science and Technology Branch, working to ensure the department is a national and world leader in advancing, connecting and applying scientific understanding of the environment to anticipate and address the most pressing environmental issues, most notably climate change, plastic pollution, and biodiversity conservation.
Doubtless, she’ll be irresistible in telling Canuck kids to ease up on the maple syrup.
It’s the hive mindset of the ruling elite in these countries, elevating leftwing ideology over practicality, even to their own decline.
But the problem is not Hamzawi, who may be a sweet and lovely person inside, though certainly not outside. It’s progressivism, which has mortally infected the entire Anglosphere, again with one exception. It’s the hive mindset of the ruling elite in these countries, elevating leftwing ideology over practicality, even to their own decline. And it has driven my few remaining liberal friends mad.
I cited on social media the obvious conflict between Nancy Hamzawi’s subpar health and her new job with respect to Canada. “Canada used to have some of the funniest comedians anywhere — many of them on SCTV. Now they’re running the government and are unintentionally funny.” My friends’ furious replies make clear why Stephen Colbert and his ilk are being thrown off the air, beginning with one from an ex-Hollywood mate, Steve, who relocated to Vancouver.
“Seriously?” Steve lashed out. “You’re fat-shaming somebody? Wtf?” I amicably yet foolishly tried to apply reason in my response. “No, I’m mocking a country that would put a fat woman in a job intended to prevent children from becoming fat.” Steve was not soothed. “I live in Canada and am a Canadian citizen. I think your attitude is sh_t.” I withheld my mental response. “Boy, have you found a home.”
My friend and frequent Facebook foil, Robert, was just as typically illogical. “What’s your resting heart rate?” he challenged. “What’s your blood pressure? Are you able to run 10 miles, 5 miles, 5k, 1 mile?” As a matter of fact, my heart rate and blood pressure are fine, and I can run a mile. None of which has anything to do with my original point.
Of course, my actual reply induced TDS-stricken social media silence. “I support President Trump’s recent Executive Order reinstating the Presidential Fitness Test,” I posted. The test requires students to complete a series of physical feats, including a minimum number of sit-ups, pushups, and pullups.
“For far too long, the physical and mental health of the American people has been neglected,” the EO states. “Rates of obesity, chronic disease, inactivity, and poor nutrition are at crisis levels, particularly among our children. These trends weaken our economy, military readiness, academic performance, and national morale.”
Somehow, I doubt Nancy Hamzawi could pass this test or even inspire young Canadians to take it. So far, there has been no policy statement from the Public Health Agency of Canada. I suspect when PHAC issues one, it will be as indecipherable as its Hamzawi selection announcement. This is the difference between a now serious country like the USA and an unserious one like Canada.
Given a choice last March to elect a semi-conservative or a progressive clown as prime minister, most Canadians honked for Mark Carney. Doubtless my friend, Steve, was one of them. The immediate result is that the projected federal deficit for 2025-26 exceeds $92 billion, according to the Canadian think tank the C.D. Howe Institute, nearly double what was forecast earlier in the year. So, the Department of Finance Canada will have a hard time paying Nancy Hamzawi what she isn’t worth.
I always liked Canada. When I was a boy, I wanted to be a Mountie. But today, the only one who could probably make the cut is Dudley Do-Right.
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