Extreme sports are just that — extreme. At my age, every sport feels like an extreme sport, except maybe chess or racing to the bar before everyone else. When someone with gray hair decides to try a new sport, they risk looking exactly like what they are: someone trying a new sport. When a young person does it, it’s charming, and everyone empathizes with their efforts, overlooking their failures. But when an adult does it, everyone assumes they just got divorced and traded a 50-year-old spouse for two 25-year-olds. These tips will help you avoid making a complete fool of yourself and, with some luck, keep your clients from ditching you over your new sports hobby.
Why?
The big questions the ancient philosophers asked still matter. After 40, when your body suddenly urges you to learn surfing, canyoneering, or to buy a mountain bike and hurl yourself off a rocky cliff, you need to stare at yourself in the mirror and ask one simple question: Why?
I don’t know how many years you have left, but if you’ve made it 40 years without surfing, you might survive another 40 without it. However, if you start surfing, canyoneering, and mountain biking around 50, I can tell you how many years you have left — and “years” might be generous.
Cover Yourself
Around 50, no matter what extreme sport you’re trying or how far you escape civilization to practice in private, the moment you start learning, you’ll flash your butt within the first 15 minutes. And in 99 percent of cases, that accidental exposure will happen right when your best client spots you, asking their group, “Isn’t that Jim?” It’s happened to me. Twice. Once, while getting on a surfboard on a “deserted” beach that wasn’t so deserted. The second time was worse — learning to do poolside acrobatics. With the majestic enthusiasm of my first leap, my swimsuit stayed put while I soared, landing buck-naked in the pool with my trunks tangled around one foot. “Nice dive,” I heard from behind, the voice of a well-known businessman I ...