Years ago, I was watching Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show. Then playing Magnum PI, Tom Selleck was featured and Carson asked him a political question. Selleck replied his job was to play people he wasn’t as well as he could, so he couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to know his political views. Obviously, Rachel Zegler is too young to have seen that show, or to have taken to heart Selleck’s lesson. One might also take to heart what Woody Allen said in Annie Hall in 1977:

“When my mother took me to see Snow White, everyone fell in love with Snow White. I immediately fell for the wicked Queen.”

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I knew the Snow White remake, which I haven’t seen and likely won’t even when it lands in the WalMart $5 dollar bin, was in trouble when we were expected to believe Gal Godot was jealous of Rachel Zegler’s looks. Miss Zegler isn’t unattractive, but Gadot is unquestionably beautiful and classy while Zegler is, at best, neighborhood cute and witlessly loud-mouthed. Of course, we’re dealing with people who think guys menstruate, need tampons and can give birth, so what can one expect?

I knew it was doomed when Disney replaced the seven dwarves with seven “magical creatures,” thinly veiled avatars for every LGBTQ+ groomer infiltrating women’s locker rooms, American’s classrooms and drag queen story hours at elementary schools and libraries. When that blew up in their faces, the corporate groomers at Disney replaced them with computer generated simulacrums while simultaneously denying little people actors seven rare jobs. If there was ever a tiny, underserved minority, they’re it, and Disney’s leftist groomers, apparently in the name of all that is woke, canceled them.

So, we were left with Brownish White and the Seven CGI Electrons.

Trying to remake Snow White was always a monumentally dumb idea. The original was a classic, the genuine article, as Steve Martin said in Leap of Faith, and you don’t mess with the genuine article. A good young woman is saved from a bad life by a good man and lives happily ever after. Evil is vanquished, good wins. Women, other than unhappy, neurotic Dem female college grads, want to find a good man who adores them and will take care of them, and good men want to find a good woman and be that man. A kiss, an expression of love and dedication, awakened the princess, overcoming the evil of the Queen who poisoned her. Is there a more American story? 

Zegler, attacking the genuine article, called the Prince a stalker.  

So, of course, leftists, who believe man can be perfected if only man listens to them, had to screw with it. It made only $43 million in its opening weekend making it the worst performing Disney live action remake to date. It reportedly cost around $250 million—a quarter of a billion dollars—to make. That’s likely because they had to remake it three or so times, and it will never come close to making a profit.

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But whose fault is that? Aren’t evil conservatives purposely trying to damage Disney?  Not so much:

Family and animated movies’ ticket sales come from 63% Blue counties and 37% Red counties while their attendance stems from 60% Blue counties and 40% Red counties. That means that Snow White with 40% ticket sales and 43.5% admissions from Red county-based cinemas overindexed in such locations. 

What this revealing detail means is that the studio has lost its ability to spin this as a social backlash. Disney cannot dismiss this as an intolerant reaction when its film performed below expectations with its dependable blue locations. Coupled with the diminished interest in international territories, this is a sign that the product quality was the issue. Anti-woke backlash is no longer an excuse when the avoidance by audiences was across the spectrum.

As I earlier mentioned, I haven’t seen the movie, but what one quickly discovers in reading reviews is a dramatic split between professional critics, who have a vested interest in propping up wokeness in general, and audiences who largely want wholesome and entertaining family fare. With this film, even professional critics are often damning it with faint praise, and some have been outright honest, and thereby, brutal.   IMDB gave it 2 out of 10.

Graphic: IMDb Screenshot

Normal Americans have been largely honest/brutal in their assessments. They think it a poorly made, tedious, hectoring failure. That’s to be expected in a movie that had to be rewritten and reshot multiple times. In 2022, Warner Brothers decided not to release Batgirl, a $70 million dollar movie that eventually cost $90 million. Its advance screenings were so badly received they decided to cut their losses. It appears Disney would have been wise to do the same.

Donald Trump was right. Everything woke touches turns to s**t.

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Mike McDaniel is a USAF veteran, classically trained musician, Japanese and European fencer, life-long athlete, firearm instructor, retired police officer and high school and college English teacher. He is a published author and blogger. His home blog is Stately McDaniel Manor.